I'm feeling particularly lame today. I suck. I waste so much time on shopping on ebay. Not really buying much, but just scanning through hundreds of cashmere sweaters and other random nonsense that I don't need. Oop. I just thought of another thing that I could search for that I haven't looked for in a while. I'm resisting the urge to go to the ebay tab I always have open and search right now.
Exercising 3 times a week has been a real struggle. I'm blaming my screwed up sleep cycle. We went to bed at a decent hour last night--before 10:30, and I laid there for an hour, unable to fall asleep. My left shoulder was aching and my right deltoid was twitching--it had been since the afternoon. Frustrated, I got up, reheated my cherry pillow, and took half a muscle relaxer. I sat up searching the web for pictures of saps/blackjacks/slapjacks---I have no idea why. After about 30 minutes I went back to bed. I started to feel relaxed, but then my brain turned on and I couldn't sleep. Ack! I probably fell asleep around 1am. This morning----I slept till almost 11. Although last night was a bit extreme, sleeping in till 10 has become the norm for me. I have to get out of this rut. The plan: get up very early tomorrow and not nap at all. We have plans tomorrow night, so I'm sure we will be up late. Going to yoga tomorrow will also help wear me out so that I don't have trouble falling asleep. Damn I miss having a Queen sized bed.
There are plenty of things for me to do besides waste time on ebay. I mean, I used to fancy myself a writer, but the crap I write on this blog about movies and books is so lame! I didn't even mention the acting in Mama---which was great. I used to paint, I used to play the cello. It's like the creative side of me has just shriveled up and now all I do is observe/consume. I don't have anything that I'm really passionate about or put all my effort into--not even ebay.
In an attempt to get out of my funk today I pulled out my cello. It hadn't seen the light of day in years. I managed to tune it and then set it out on its stand. It has been so long I'm going to have to start over. I've printed out some things from the internets to try and teach myself how to play again. I think I need to actually write up a list of things that I can do besides watch TV or sit on the laptop. I have a week to finish knitting my mom's scarf and that is completely doable. I have a library book to finish. I just have to force myself out of bed and then resist the urge to sit in front of the tv/laptop.