Saturday, November 28, 2009

The Universe is Screaming

The Universe is screaming at me, but I'm not sure what it is trying to say or what I'm supposed to do. I feel like the Arab-Israeli conflict, the Holocaust, Auschwitz, and anti-Semitism keep popping up. When I received a letter from the Anti Defamation League asking for money I thought that might be what this is all about. I sent them a check, but the Universe is still screaming. Maybe I am filtering, because when I think about it -- it isn't just anti-Semitism I'm hearing, it is discrimination in general -- hate.

I have certain scripted answers to hot-button questions. When people used to ask me what I was, I would make them come out and explicitly ask me. I would make them just as uncomfortable as they were making me. I don't get upset anymore. I have my scripted answer. Sometimes I still make them squirm. I just don't see why it matters what race or ethnicity I am, so I make them pay for my scripted answer. I think maybe what I need to do is compose a scripted answer to hatred. I need to have something ready to say not just when I hear someone say something anti-Semitic in front of me, but anything discriminatory. Maybe that is what the Universe is trying to tell me. I need to grow a pair and speak up.

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